Friendship Breakups: The Heartbreak, Grief & Support

The Heartbreak

It is natural to be upset when a friend breaks up with you. After all, you are losing someone who has been a part of your life for a long time. You may have also put time and effort into that relationship. In most cases, getting over a friend's breakup does not take long. However, some people have a difficult time recovering from this type of breakup. This article will help you understand what these people are going through and how they can move on.

Friendships dissolve for a variety of reasons. According to research, friendships that are chosen to end are the result of circumstances such as no longer working together, growing apart, lying, negativity, obligation, rivalry, toxicity, and values. Whatever the reason for the friendship's demise, each breakup can be painful and overwhelming.

The Grief

Nobody ever talks about how much emotional and physical pain the body and mind can go through when a friendship ends. According to studies, breaking up a friendship has the same effect on one's well-being as breaking up a romantic relationship.

An excellent article in Psychology Today suggests,

"Be sad. Even if you chose to end the friendship (or had it done to you), the loss is no less heartbreaking than the loss of any other important relationship. Allow yourself time to process and express your sadness or anger. Tell it to someone who is not biased (not mutual friends). Journal, write, or draw. Seek assistance."

Give yourself a period of no contact before trying to see your friend in a neutral setting, and don't use social media to monitor your friend. We sometimes only spend a season with people rather than a lifetime with them, and your friend brought you much that was valuable.

Stages of Grief

Denial:

The first stage of grief is denial. Denial is when you refuse to believe that your friend's breakup has actually happened.

Anger:

The second stage of grief is anger. Anger is the feeling you get when you are frustrated and angry with your friend for breaking up with you. You may feel like they have ruined your life and don't deserve to be in your life anymore.

Bargaining:

The third stage of grief is bargaining. Bargaining is when you try to negotiate with the person who broke up with you, to get them back in return for something else, such as a promise not to contact them again or a promise not to break up again in the future.

Depression:

The fourth stage of grief is depression. Depression can be tough because it's likely that it will last a long time, which can make it difficult for people who are grieving their friend's breakup to function properly during the day-to-day activities of their lives.

Getting Through a Breakup in a Friendship

We all have our own way of getting over a friend's breakup. Some of us have to go through the process alone, while others are lucky enough to have friends or family members who can help them get back on their feet. The duration of recovery depends on many factors, which include the intensity of the friendship, how long you were together with your friend, and how often you interacted with them. Some people recover in a few days or weeks, while others take months or even years to recover from a friend's breakup.

• Your Pain & Emotions Are Valid

Understanding friendships to be less valuable can affect the support we get from others during our grief (or lack thereof) and how we deal with our own grief. According to studies, isolation, distress, and fatigue can result from repression and refusal to communicate, particularly when it comes to our grief. It's crucial to acknowledge our loss and validate our feelings in order to avoid stifling our pain. We must accept the importance of our friendship breaks and process them accordingly.

• Allow yourself to feel your emotions by writing a letter to them

It is critical to grieve your friendship and allow yourself to feel your emotions. If you're having trouble grieving for a lost friend, a research study suggests writing a letter to them and tearing it up. This will allow you to express yourself honestly without fear of being judged.

• Prioritize yourself

Self-care is vital when you are dealing with sadness and grieving a loss. Make time for yourself and treat yourself with kindness and compassion. Try not to obsess over their social media, old messages, and photos. If you find yourself ruminating on anything that reminds you of your friend, remember to be gentle with yourself as you work through difficult times. Suggestions for self-care include journaling, meditation, going for a walk, listening to music, leaning on your support system, or finding ways to become aware of your emotions, feelings, and thoughts.

• Share Your Grief with Your Support System

Seek support from your support system during these difficult times. Create a list of people who you feel have your back. This could range from family members to loved ones, or friends. Start thinking about if there is someone that you can call or text just to get extra support during tough times.

Create Your Support System:

• Determine who you want in your support system

Look for people who are kind and respectful to you and have your best interests at heart. Scroll through your contacts to see who you can rely on to keep you safe and warm when things get tough. It is critical to have a safe feeling when discussing your difficult experience with someone.

• 2. Connect with a mental health professional

Building a support system should start with working with experts like therapists or mental health counselors. Professionals can help you with daily struggles while also delving deeply into any bigger problems that smaller problems may be a symptom of.

Conclusion

Friendship breakups can be excruciatingly painful, and they can last for a long time. Allow yourself to appreciate what the friendship meant to you as you go through the healing process of any breakup. It can be difficult to let go, especially if there was no closure. If you are going through a friendship breakup, take some time to reflect on what you learned from this friendship. It's okay to be sad and hurt over this breakup. It is not necessary to sweep your emotions under the rug, as this is unhealthy. Don't let other people's opinions influence how you want to heal and process everything that has happened to you. Because you and your friend were great friends who shared many fun adventures that you will always remember and cherish.

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. - Eleanor Roosevelt